


To Do

by labocat



Category: Untitled Goose Game (Video Game), 镇魂 | Guardian (TV)
Genre: Crack, Gen, surprise goose
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:15:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23695276
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/labocat/pseuds/labocat
Summary: There's a goose. In the kitchen.
Relationships: Shen Wei/Zhao Yunlan
Comments: 12
Kudos: 45
Collections: What Fen Do (Instead of Going Outside), When Death Loves Flamingos





	To Do

**Author's Note:**

  * For [draconicsockpuppet](https://archiveofourown.org/users/draconicsockpuppet/gifts).



“There’s. A goose.” Shen Wei blinks, adorably, his eyes big and wide and confused behind his glasses, so adorably that Zhao Yunlan almost forgets what he’d even said.

“Hmm? Oh, yes, him! Seems like he followed Da Qing home, the useless bastard.”

Da Qing, who had made it a habit to try not to be in the same room with Shen Wei and Zhao Yunlan at the same time for too long lest he witness anything that will mar whatever respect he has left - for Shen Wei as the Envoy, anyway; Zhao Yunlan had lost those rights a long time ago - jumps down off the windowsill.

“ _I_ had nothing to do with it. It’s clearly not a normal goose, if it was able to follow me and get in. Either way, it’s your problem now.”

Zhao Yunlan makes a grab for Da Qing, or at least an attempt to swat him off of the table. He knew Da Qing wouldn’t actually eat any of his breakfast - it's just coffee, but it was the motion that counted, from both of them.

Shen Wei, meanwhile, moves towards the goose, slowly, as if it might run in fear or as if whatever it is is not masquerading as a species more likely to charge, unnatural toothed tongue and wings bared. 

...on second thought, were they all sure that geese actually were originally of Haixing?

Zhao Yunlan is about to hop off of his chair and try and intervene, no matter that Shen Wei is the Envoy, feared and respected in just as many realms as Zhao Yunlan is, he can’t just let it attach Shen Wei in _their_ home.

But before he can, Shen Wei’s hand makes contact with the goose’s head, petting it lightly. There’s a moment where they all kind of look at each other, surprised, before they are startled back into action by a “HONK!” that sounds entirely too happy.

The goose doesn’t leave Shen Wei’s side for the rest of the morning, a fact which Zhao Yunlan finds _very_ irritating, given that while it seems perfectly happy to follow Shen Wei around like one of his underlings, it honks - not at all softly - whenever Zhao Yunlan comes near.

It’s not like the kitchen is that big in the first place, but he hasn’t even kissed Shen Wei good morning yet!

After about the fourth honk, he’s had it. In a lunge, he scoops up the goose, shooing Shen Wei and Da Qing out of the kitchen and holding fast as the goose tries to flap its wings to escape.

“That’s it! This goose clearly isn’t normal; it’s coming to the SID with me! I’ll give it to Lin Jing for all I care!”

Unbeknownst to all of them, somewhere, a line gets scratched out.

~~To Do: Infiltrate the Special Investigations Department~~

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[Podfic] To Do](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24458404) by [GoLBPodfics (GodOfLaundryBaskets)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/GodOfLaundryBaskets/pseuds/GoLBPodfics)




End file.
